Grammaropolis
The Writing Company · with the Mayor

Write to Describe

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Write to Describe

When you describe, you draw a picture with words. Give the reader two senses, and they are standing beside you.

When you describe, you draw a picture with words. Here is what your picture needs now.

  1. Your thing
    Name what you are describing. One sentence.
  2. Two senses
    What do you see? What do you hear, smell, or feel? Give the reader two.
  3. The trade
    Trade a feeling word for a sense detail. Not "it was fun." Show the fun.
  4. Your best detail last
    End on the detail you want the reader to keep.

Spend your tools

Your craft moves still help. Here they are, pointed at describing.

Jake portrait

Jake · Show, do not tell

Could we be more specific? Do not tell me it was exciting. Show me one thing you saw, and I will feel the excitement myself.

It was exciting. The fish flashed orange when the flakes hit the water.

Nelson portrait

Nelson · Specific nouns

A noun names a person, a place, a thing, or an idea. "Pet" and "food" stay vague. "Fish" and "flakes" are the exact things. Name the exact one.

I gave the pet some food. I shook flakes into the fish tank.

Vinny portrait

Vinny · Strong verbs

Some writers add an adverb to a weak verb, like "came up quickly." One strong verb does it better. The fish darted. Pick the one strong verb.

The fish came up quickly. The fish darted up.

Connie portrait

Connie · Join two sentences

Two short sentences can become one. Use and, but, or so to join them. "He poured, and they came up" reads smooth.

My brother poured the food. The fish came up. My brother poured the food, and the fish came up.

The Describe Plan

Same three moves as always. When you describe, the plan is the Close Look.

The Mayor's Power Plan

  • Pick it. Choose one thing you know well.
  • Plan it. Look close, and find two senses.
  • Pour it on. Write, and make your trade: sense details in, feeling words out.

The Close Look

Look close, find two senses, and your reader stands beside you.

  1. Pick your thing. What are you describing?
  2. Two senses: what do you see, and what do you hear, smell, or feel?
  3. The trade: which feeling word goes out, and which sense detail comes in?
  4. Save your best detail for last.
Watch the Mayor plan it

Watch me describe a place you know from the fish afternoon: the fish tank in the front room.

Pick it. The fish tank. I watch it every day. My reader has never seen it.

Plan it.

  • My thing The fish tank by the window.
  • Two senses I see the orange fish flash between the green plants. I hear the filter bubble in the corner.
  • My trade Not "the fish are cute." The littlest fish wiggles up for a flake.
  • My best detail last The flakes drift down like snow, and the fish rise to meet them.

Pour it on. When I write it, I do not say the tank is nice or the fish are cute. I show the flash and the bubbling and the wiggle. The reader watches the tank with me, and they decide.

Start the quiz →